it infuriates me when people tell me “lifes too short to not forgive people!” like NO lifes too short for me to continually allow abusive and manipulative behavior in my life and live in a constant state of anxiety bc I want to be “nice” or whatever
Vampire doctors that can smell if you have a blood disease.
Werewolf therapy animals for sick kids.
Nature sprite and nymph nurses that always make sure people have pretty flowers to brighten up their white rooms.
Fauns that go around and sing and dance for patients so that they smile.
Nice monster hospitals would be amazing
Someone write a book about this.
If an intruder ever comes to fucking murder you. You throw your mother fucking head back pull your arms in weird shapes and whip your head forward again and say the anti crist has awoken whilst smiling the biggest smile you have ever made. no smart person would ever fuck around with you if you did that.
STOP REBLOGGING THIS PLEASE ABORT MISSION ABORT MISSION
I HAVE NEVER LAUGHED SO HARD IN MY LIFFFEEE
do you ever hang out w/ someone and realize it’s not what you wanted to do and then you’re trapped for a few hours
what if i died in like twenty years and all i left my girlfriend was a box and like she gasps and reaches down to her chest where her key necklace hangs that i gave her twenty two years ago, and she uses it to unlock the box and all that is in there is a string which you can pull to reveal an embarrassing photo of spongebob at the christmas party